I wished ethin was ........

just facts...haha..wat am i talking about...sometimes u wish u could say more but yet d situation doesn't allow...or probably u're just too afraid to add on more stress/hurts.....others wouldn't know how paralysed u feel....they think u're fine..well...i guess i'll just put it as a give n take thingy in life...sometimes u do wish life is just bout books..i wish i could just start all over...i'm just too weak to carry myself thru...yet at times like this He always reminds me that He'll carry me thru..oh what could i say ......d only word is vanity...it's only in Him you'll find satisfaction....u can go searching high n low in life...do the greatest thing,have ethin in d world..but like what King Solomon says it's vanity...am i crappin too much..it's just so hard to tell what's within me now....getting harder n harder....freaking me out at times..i'm sad..yes i am....that at times i don't know how to cry anymore...i know i cant be this way for long..then i'll pull myself up again.......i may lie,i may hurt those around me,i may act ridiculous,i may take whoever for granted...but yet why not try understanding me...why is it slaps from left,right n centre?why all d fake words...why d selfish desires,why is it that i can't even hv trust from those closest to me...what's d point then?yea what's d point...i see no point but yet that small little faith in me in 'me n them' keeps me goin...tho i may stumble n fall yet i'm sure that faith will still be there...i wish you could just take a lil more time to find out what's within me....try understanding things from my perspective...am i asking too much...yea..probably you have ur sets of wants too....what else can i ask...NOTHING!!!!!............